A Fatty's Dictionary

Some words have different meanings for us fatties. Good thing I'm here to help you make sense of it all.

Husky- Code word for fat, hurts your feelings without trying to

All-you-can-eat buffet- A long word that basically means heaven

Hottie- A girl, who most people view as at best a 6, that you think is the most beautiful girl in the world

Big boned- see Husky

Big and tall clothes- About the only place you can go to find clothes that fit you (correctly)

Free food- unfortunately this actually doesn't exist

"You're really funny"- I never want to date you....ever

"No, really you have a great personality"- Seriously, get away from me

Salad- magic word that makes anything healthy, even if it's mostly mayo such as potato salad

Diet Coke- none of the flavor with all of the guilt

A flight of stairs- Today's workout

"Just wait till I get skinny"- what every fatty says right before the eat fast food

Drive-thru window- Kind of like Cheers, where everybody knows your name

Big boy- what most of your friends call you, not the restaurant

"No really, I was skinny back in the day"- Every lie a fatty tells themself to make them think one day they could be skinny

Jared from Subway- traitor

Subway- most people think of veggies, you think extra meat and bacon

Kevin James- All-time favorite actor

Lunch- 3 sandwiches, a large bag of chips, 44 oz fountain drink and a twinkie

Sports- what you watch on TV while thinking to yourself  "I could be an NFL offensive lineman"